What Can You Do Before Someone Passes?

March 8, 2024

Share this article

Knowing that a loved one will soon pass away causes a wealth of emotions and racing thoughts. What can you do for them to make their final days easier? Here are a few ways to help your loved one prepare for their last days, as well as what you should do to ensure that you’re taking care of yourself.

What can you do for them?

1. Talk about what they want in their funeral and disposition early.

You might not always have a warning when someone in your life is about to pass away. But when you do, be sure to talk about what they want in their funeral and disposition while they’re in a good headspace and still able to speak. It can be hard to think about what comes next after a loss, but in order to honor their final wishes, you need to be aware of what those wishes are. Talk to them about any plans that they’ve made and ensure you have access to any documents that list what they would like to happen.

2. Talk with them or to them.

When your loved one is nearer to passing, it’s time to focus on their care to ensure their last days are happy and comfortable. While they are still able, talk with your loved one. The end of life can be a lonely time, so focus on the happy memories you’ve shared together. Bring photo albums and other mementos to trigger memories. If your loved one is struggling to speak or remember those moments in life, it’s okay to simply talk to them rather than with them. Hearing your voice can be a great comfort, and it’s important not to try to push your loved one to expend too much energy. Simply sitting by their side and speaking, whether it be about your day or a memory you shared many years ago, can provide them some cheer.

3. Touch them if they are physically able to be touched.

Physical touch is how many people show and receive love. Find ways to incorporate touch into your visits with your loved one. That may mean brushing their hair or rubbing their back, but be sure that the method that you choose is not painful. If your loved one is frail and can’t be touched much, holding their hand may be a safer option.

4. Create a quiet but familiar environment.

Loud noises can often be unpleasant to those who are near to passing away, so avoid any sudden sounds, like a telephone ring or a shout from a television. But if there’s a type of music or a movie that was beloved throughout their life, play it for them, being conscious of the volume level. Soft background music, in particular, has been found to relax people in their final days. However, if you see any signs of discomfort while the music or movie is playing, they may prefer silence instead.

What can you do for yourself?

1. Speak with a funeral director.

You may think it’s best to wait until your loved one has passed to begin working with a funeral home to prepare their funeral. However, funeral directors have years of experience caring for families whose loved ones have passed away. A funeral director is more than someone who organizes funerals. They are a resource for those coping with grief. They can gently guide you through the funeral planning process and offer additional support during this difficult time.

2. Surround yourself with friends and family.

When someone important to you is passing away, grief and stress can sometimes cause isolation. Especially when you know that someone is about to pass on, you’re aware that the mourning is only beginning. And that can feel very overwhelming. Lean on your support network and don’t be afraid to ask for help. You have people who love you, and they want to be there for you, just like you want to be there for your loved one in their final days.

3. Be patient with yourself.

Grief does not begin with the passing of a loved one. It can start much earlier, especially when you know that their passing is coming. Grief can cause irritability, numbness, and detachment, so you may not feel like yourself when you’re in a period of mourning. Just as you would be patient with a friend who is not acting like themselves because of grief, be understanding with yourself. You may find that speaking with a therapist or another mental health professional is essential to help you cope with how you’re feeling.

4. Say goodbye.

When a loved one passes away unexpectedly, people often wish they had a chance to say goodbye. But in this case, you know that your loved one will be gone soon. We all wish we had more time with the ones we love, but at the very least, now you have the opportunity to say the things you want to say to them. Tell them you love them. Tell them you’ll miss them. Let them know how much they mean to you. You’ll still mourn them when they’re gone, but at least you’ll know that they passed away with one of the last things they heard being that you love them.

When a loved one is soon to pass away, one of the best things that you can do is be there for them. Visit them often, providing them with a familiar face, comforting voice, and loving touch. But as you take care of them and their final affairs, don’t forget to take care of yourself. The last days of your loved one’s life are the start of a period of mourning. Lean on your friends, family, and funeral director, who all want to support you through this challenging time.

www.jerniganwarren.com

Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home has been serving the families of Fayetteville, North Carolina and surrounding communities since 1930. The funeral home serves families of all faiths with the highest quality funeral, memorial, burial, and cremation services. They are especially proud to serve veterans and members of the military community with respect and dignity. Find more information about the Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home and their services by visiting jerniganwarren.com.

Recent Posts

September 4, 2026
Summary • Planning ahead can bring peace of mind to individuals and their loved ones. • Preplanning may help ensure personal wishes are honored and reduce emotional stress. • It can offer financial clarity by allowing families to explore options thoughtfully. • Many families in Fayetteville find comfort in documenting preferences early. Why Should I Plan a Funeral in Advance? Planning a funeral in advance is a thoughtful and compassionate decision that may ease future stress for loved ones. Families in Fayetteville, NC, often ask why preplanning matters, and the answer typically centers on peace of mind, clarity, and emotional comfort. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), many adults believe that documenting their wishes early may help reduce the emotional burden on family members. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) encourages individuals to learn about their options long before they are needed. Under the FTC’s Funeral Rule, families have the right to receive clear pricing information, compare services, and ask questions without pressure. AARP also notes that preplanning can spark valuable conversations within families. These discussions may help ensure that final arrangements reflect personal beliefs, values, and preferences. Peace of Mind and Emotional Comfort Preplanning a funeral may relieve loved ones of stressful decisions during a time of grief. When arrangements are documented ahead of time, families can focus on remembrance, connection, and healing. Financial Protection and Control Preplanning can also bring financial clarity. Individuals can compare options, understand costs, and make thoughtful, informed decisions. Some families choose to prefund arrangements to help guard against rising costs, though prefunding is never required. Frequently Asked Questions What are the benefits of preplanning a funeral? Preplanning can ease emotional stress, ensure personal wishes are followed, and allow families to make thoughtful decisions ahead of time. Can I change my funeral plans later? Yes. Most funeral plans can be updated at any time to reflect new preferences or circumstances. Does preplanning save money? It may. Preplanning allows individuals to compare options and, if they choose, secure certain costs at today’s prices to help protect against inflation. Written for Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home, proudly serving families in Fayetteville with compassion and care. About Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home provides professional and compassionate funeral and cremation services to families in Fayetteville, NC. Their experienced staff is dedicated to offering guidance and support during both preplanning and times of need. Families in Fayetteville, NC, can contact Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home at (910) 483-1331 for compassionate guidance on funeral preplanning. Located at 545 Ramsey St, Fayetteville, NC 28301 , their caring team is available to offer clarity, comfort, and support. www.jerniganwarren.com
August 7, 2026
Summary • Families in Fayetteville often wonder whether cremation or burial is the right choice when planning a meaningful farewell. • According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the median cost of a funeral with burial is $8,300, while a funeral with cremation averages $6,280. • Direct cremation typically ranges from $2,800 to $3,000, offering a simpler and more affordable option for many families. • Both burial and cremation may include meaningful services that reflect personal, cultural, or religious traditions. Cremation vs. Burial – Which Is Better and Which Is Cheaper? Families in Fayetteville, North Carolina, often ask whether cremation or burial is the better choice when planning arrangements for a loved one. Each option may provide meaningful ways to honor a life, and the right decision often depends on cultural traditions, religious beliefs, and personal preferences. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the national median cost of a funeral with burial is about $8,300, while a funeral with cremation averages $6,280. Direct cremation typically ranges from $2,800 to $3,000 based on national averages as of 2025. Burial may be chosen by families who value having a permanent resting place for future visits. Traditional burial services may include a visitation, funeral ceremony, and graveside service, offering structure and familiarity during a difficult time. The Cremation Association of North America (CANA) notes that cremation continues to rise in popularity because it offers flexibility. Families may take more time to plan a meaningful service and may choose to keep, scatter, or place cremated remains in a location of significance. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) encourages families to review itemized price lists when comparing funeral homes. Service selections, merchandise, and cemetery requirements can influence total costs, whether choosing burial or cremation . Frequently Asked Questions Is cremation more affordable than burial? According to the NFDA, cremation is often more affordable. A funeral with cremation averages $6,280, while a funeral with burial averages $8,300. Direct cremation usually ranges from $2,800 to $3,000. Can you still have a service with cremation? Yes. Families may hold a visitation, funeral ceremony, or celebration of life either before or after the cremation, offering flexibility while preserving opportunities for remembrance. What factors influence funeral costs? Funeral costs may vary depending on service choices, merchandise, transportation needs, and cemetery requirements. The FTC recommends reviewing itemized pricing to better understand available options. Written for Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home, proudly serving families in Fayetteville with compassion and care. About Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home is located at 545 Ramsey St, Fayetteville, NC 28301 and can be reached at (910) 483-1331. The funeral home is honored to support families across Fayetteville and the surrounding communities with meaningful funeral and cremation services. www.jerniganwarren.com
July 10, 2026
Summary • Funeral services typically include professional care, planning support, and coordination to help families honor loved ones with dignity. • According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), many services involve a visitation, ceremony, and opportunities for remembrance. • The Funeral Rule, enforced by the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), requires funeral homes to clearly outline available services through an itemized General Price List, ensuring transparency and understanding. • Families in Fayetteville may personalize services with music, photographs, or meaningful tributes that reflect their loved one’s life. What Do Funeral Services Include? Families in Fayetteville often ask what funeral services include and how each element supports remembrance and healing. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), funeral services are designed to bring comfort, structure, and meaningful opportunities to honor a loved one’s life. All information provided reflects national guidance as of 2025. Funeral directors typically guide families through each step of the process. They may coordinate with clergy or celebrants, musicians, cemeteries, and other service providers while ensuring necessary documentation is completed. The Funeral Rule, enforced by the Federal Trade Commission, requires funeral homes to outline all available services through an itemized price list, known as the General Price List, ensuring transparency and understanding. Funeral services often include a visitation, gathering, or ceremony that may be religious, spiritual, or non-religious. These events allow family and friends to reflect, share memories, and support one another. The Funeral Consumers Alliance (FCA) highlights that such ceremonies play a meaningful role in honoring a life and fostering connection. Transportation and logistics typically include transfer from the place of death, use of a funeral coach, and coordination with a cemetery or crematory. Families may also receive assistance with filing death certificates, securing permits, or preparing obituary notices. Personalization is often a meaningful part of the experience. Families may choose music, photographs, readings, video tribtes, or keepsakes that reflect the individual's personality, values, and legacy. Frequently Asked Questions What are the main parts of a funeral service? Most funeral services include professional care, planning guidance, transportation, a visitation or ceremony, and assistance with legal or administrative documentation. Are funeral services customizable? Yes. Many families choose personalized elements such as music, readings, photographs, or video tributes to reflect their loved one’s unique life and traditions. What is the role of the funeral director? Funeral directors coordinate service details, guide families through important decisions, and ensure that legal and ceremonial requirements are handled with professionalism and care. Written for Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home, proudly serving families in Fayetteville with compassion and care. About Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home, located at 545 Ramsey St, Fayetteville, NC 28301 , provides professional and compassionate funeral and cremation care for families throughout the community. For more information, call (910) 483-1331. www.jerniganwarren.com
June 5, 2026
Summary • Families can record or fund their funeral plans in advance to ease emotional and financial stress. • Many funeral homes offer prepaid arrangements held in trust or backed by insurance for protection. • Flexible payment plans may be available depending on state regulations and provider policies. • Planning ahead helps ensure personal wishes are honored and provides peace of mind. Can I Prepay or Preplan a Funeral? Families in Fayetteville often ask about the advantages of preplanning and prepaying for funeral arrangements . According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), preplanning allows individuals to record their choices in advance, reducing emotional and logistical stress for loved ones during difficult moments. Prepaying is an option for those who wish to set aside funds or pay for their funeral in advance. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) notes that many prepaid funeral plans use trusts or insurance policies to safeguard funds until they are needed. This added protection can give families more confidence when choosing how to prepare. Guidance from AARP encourages families to ask important questions about how funds are held, what happens if they relocate, and how refunds or cancellations are handled. These details help families make informed decisions that match their needs and preferences. Payment Plans and Consumer Protections Not every family chooses to pay in full when preplanning . Many funeral homes may offer payment plans that allow costs to be spread out over time, making advance planning more manageable for a variety of budgets. North Carolina regulations and FTC standards are in place to help protect prepaid funds. These rules typically require that prepaid funds be placed into a trust or insured product to ensure they remain available when needed. Whether families choose to prepay, set up a payment plan, or simply record their wishes, preplanning can bring clarity, reassurance, and peace of mind. Frequently Asked Questions What’s the difference between preplanning and prepaying for a funeral? Preplanning involves documenting funeral or cremation preferences in advance, while prepaying sets aside or pays funds ahead of time to cover the cost of those future arrangements. Are prepaid funeral funds protected? Yes. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) and state laws typically require prepaid funds to be placed in a trust or insurance product so they are safeguarded for their intended purpose. Can I make monthly payments for a funeral plan? Many funeral homes may offer monthly or flexible payment options depending on North Carolina regulations and the provider’s policies. Written for Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home, proudly serving families in Fayetteville with compassion and care. About Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home Jernigan-Warren Funeral Home supports families in Fayetteville, North Carolina with professional, compassionate funeral and cremation care. Located at 545 Ramsey St, Fayetteville, NC 28301 , the funeral home offers guidance with traditional services, cremation options, preplanning consultations, and information about payment choices so families can make confident decisions. For more information, families may call (910) 483-1331. www.jerniganwarren.com
Show More